HCG Beta #2:

Friday Dec 27: I asked to change from progesterone in oil to the vaginal suppositories since DH is deploying and won't be able to give me my nightly bum shots.  I just couldn't stomach giving them to myself.  They are awkward enough as it is and trying to do them standing up is not my idea of a good time.  My nurse had sympathy on me and called in the suppositories.  Granted, those aren't fun either (3 times a day) but I'll take them over the shots.  Did you know that those bad boys cost $1400 per MONTH without insurance?! INSANITY.  I'm thankful Tricare is picking up the tab on that one!

My hpt's are even darker now and that brings me some peace that this isn't a chemical pregnancy like I've dealt with a lot in the past.  For now, things are looking up.  Obviously a very long way to go though...

Monday Dec 30:  I had repeat labs this morning for HCG, progesterone, estrogen, CBC, and PTT (blood clotting times).

CBC: I still have an elevated white blood cell count but that's being blamed on the Prednisone.  There was no change from last week.

HCG: 778.6.  I'm still pregnant! My nurse said it has risen appropriately!  Most likely, there's only one baby in there and for that we are so grateful!

Estrogen: It's high at 877 but my nurse wasn't concerned.  Humm....

Progesterone: 47.  It's gone up and I've been on the suppositories for 3 days so it's safe to say they are working.

PTT: No results yet as it has to be sent out but the last two times all was good. 

Next big appt is Jan 7.  I'll get repeat labs and the first ultrasound.  It's most likely too early to see a heartbeat but the goal is to see a gestational sac and fetal pole in my uterus.  DH will be gone by then and I'm trying to keep my anxiety at bay about it.  Doing this without him is scary.

I know God can call this baby home at any time.  And, He will still be good if He does.  May He have all the glory...forever. 

Journaling and Beta Results:

Dec 18:  I had four vials of blood drawn at noon today.  They are watching my blood clotting timing so it had to be done exactly four hours from my Lovenox dose/injection.  Uneventful really.  I have to go back in to the lab tomorrow and do a fasting blood sugar test because I'm on a decently high dose of Prednisone (40mg).  Blah.  I'm doing fine with the Prednisone but I'm very thankful they are watching my sugars/numbers closely.  Other than waking several times a night to pee from the Pred (and then not being able to fall back to sleep) all is fine.  The hormones I'm taking mimic pregnancy hormones/symptoms so I can't really rely on it as a way to gauge things.  Progesterone in oil will always be my nemesis but after a week into it, I'm just sore. No real knots or terrible bruising as before.  I've been taking a homeopathic histamine blocker and I think it's helping with the swelling and itching.

I've been testing out my trigger shot and it's pretty much all but gone now.  Now we're just waiting to see if the HCG comes back.  Come on babies!

Dec 20: I spoke too soon about the PIO and the Prednisone. They are not my favorite but of course are worth it if this works. But...I’m hurting.

Dec 21: Today I’m 8 days past my 3 day transfer. This is the point when I tested positive with Skittle. Aaaannnddddd...I did. It’s light, but it’s there.

Here is my progression of tests: 

And my bruised belly from Lovenox-because it’s funny! 

Dec 23: Beta blood test was this morning. Results are in! HCG-69 (over 5 is pregnant) Estrogen-223 (over 100 is good) and progesterone is 39 (over 25 is good!) I’m officially pregnant and hormones look great. 

We know that things can change very quickly but I haven’t seen these results since Skittle 10 years ago. I go back in for more blood work on Monday and if things still look good, I will have an ultrasound in 2 weeks to make sure everything is where it should be (and not in my tube).  We’ve lost a lot of babies over the years but this is a big step in the right direction. I’m nervous to accept any congratulations right now but I wanted all my followers to know what’s going on. 

I can’t thank you all enough for loving on us through this and praying your guts out. They have been felt. I will update again next week. Please continue praying that the baby (babies?) grow and stay with us. Much love to you all! 

Transfer Day:

Transfer Day: DH was able to drive me to Birmingham for the transfer today. I had to have a full bladder and that was probably the worst part of all of it. I drank my 16 oz of fresh made celery juice (yum, NOT) and started drinking water soon after getting on the road. My bladder started hurting about an hour before the procedure. Three times I had to empty a little just so I wasn’t all consumed by my very over full bladder! The doc was running behind so I’m so thankful they let me go!

Two embryos made it to today. The third never divided at all. It was one cell (so it never even fertilized). We transferred an 8 cell and a 7 cell today. They looked good but we’ve been down this road so many times before and haven’t had good outcomes. My estrogen is still high and I’m doing what I can to keep inflammation down. I’m on Lovenox and Prednisone again (and of course the standard progesterone in oil awfulness) but so far so good.

A huge thank you to my mama that came out to take care of me and Skittle while DH was gone and to my sister for holding it down with my dad in Houston.  We couldn’t do this without you all!

I leave you with our two beautiful embabies. We covet your prayers and thank you for always encouraging us in this journey. And now we wait to see if they hatch and implant.

SD8, Retrieval, Etc.

Stim Day 8:  We had a busy weekend but managed to get everything done.  I had my stim day 8 scan/blood work done in Birmingham.  Unfortunately my scan showed some free fluid which could indicate that I already ovulated some of the eggs. It was not what I wanted to hear.  I had 8-10 follicles on my left ovary and 4 on my right.  My estrogen was also 3700 and progesterone was 1.2.  My estrogen is now dangerously high and something I wasn't prepared for.  My actual RE called and gave me some options.  He said with my estrogen so high, we run the risk of overstimmulating which causes a whole host of issues.  He said he would normally request his patients with that kind of number to freeze all embryos, wait for the estrogen to come down, and transfer the next cycle.  Because of my history, he knew I wouldn't want to do that.  So, we aren't.  We are going ahead for the fresh transfer on Friday. 

Retrieval: I ended up having my retrieval on Tuesday and thankfully they actually listened to me this time about needing more meds.  I didn't feel anything! But, with more meds means more issues for me.  I was able to make it home before throwing up at least.  It's been a bit of a rough recovery.  I was told they only got eight eggs.  I'm pretty sure I ovulated through the Lupron.  Very disappointing. 

Day After the Retrieval:  I had to wait until a day later to get my fertilization report from the embryologist.  Once again, it's not good news.  Of the eight eggs, four were the right maturity for fertilization.  And of those four, only three fertilized correctly.  I was also told that one of the three was already struggling to divide so they aren't sure we will have that one to transfer come Friday.  We will not have any to freeze and will transfer fresh any/all that make it to Friday.  This was definitely not the news we wanted to hear.  Surrogacy is completely off the table since we have nothing to freeze. Things looked so good in the beginning and now have ended up pretty much exactly like the last round.  Hindsight is 20/20 of course but I wish they would have cut my meds on SD 5 and done the retrieval a day earlier.  I think things might have been different.  I think my follicles/eggs were over mature and couldn't be fertilized from too much stim medication too quickly. 

If you pray, will you pray those three babies make it to Friday and that my uterus will accept them? It's hard to remain positive when we've been down this road so many times but I do believe God can do anything.  He is the giver and taker of life.  Blessed be the name of the Lord. 

Suppression Check, Stims, Etc.

Suppression Check: I went in for my suppression check seven days after starting birth control.  A suppression check is just to make sure birth control is doing what it should, which is keeping my ovaries quiet.  I did my usual bloodwork then had my u/s.  Unfortunately, the u/s showed a ovarian cyst on my left ovary that was 1.8cm. The local nurse told me she wasn't sure if I'd be allowed to continue the cycle or not.  The determining factor would be my estrogen level.  If the cyst wasn't producing estrogen, I would be allowed to stop the bcp's and go on with the cycle.

I got the call around 5pm that my estrogen had actually dropped to 20 and that was really good news!  Everything is still a go! I haven't dealt with ovarian cysts since we lived in Kansas, 11 years ago so I was shocked to see that I had one.

I started twice daily Lupron injections and a low dose steroid.  I got AF again once I stopped the birth control. Isn't that fun? (I had 7 days between periods)  I actually thought AF wouldn't be so bad since I had just had one.  It's not like my lining had a lot of time to build back up...I was SO wrong.  I'm not sure if it's my endo or the cyst that made it so bad.  Blah.

Stim Day 3: Man, I'm already feeling my ovaries.  I'm not sure I've ever felt activity this early before.  I swear I started feeling something after the very first shot.  Again, is it the cyst?  Or a dominate follicle? (Worse case scenario) I just don't know.  I go in for a follicle scan/bloodwork to see what's going on in two days.  I'm also all of a sudden dealing with very itchy injection sites.  Granted, I am doing 4 shots a day in my stomach so that could be part of it but  I wonder if I'm dealing with histamine issues or something.  DH and I have also determined that there are good needles and there are bad ones.  Insulin needles are NOT nice.  It's almost like they are dull coming out of the package (or it's because I have to draw up the medicine with the same needle I inject with?).  They usually have a harder time going in (not smooth, almost jagged like), and the syringe is "sticky" and doesn't push in the meds evenly.  Maybe it's because they are cheap.  Mystifies me. And they hurt more.

DH had an uneventful semen analysis/freeze up in Birmingham.  I'm glad that's done and out of the way.  His results were "beautiful" (the nurses words, not mine) so he doesn't have to go in again to do another one before my egg retrieval next week.

I'm anxious to see what the scans are like...

********************************************

Stim Day 5:I had three vials of blood taken (CBC, estrogen, progesterone etc) and an ultrasound this morn.  And now I know why I was feeling my ovaries...My nurse counted 18 follicles, 7 of which were measurable and near maturity! My numbers are already DOUBLE what they were last round!  I'm waiting for a call from Birmingham to tell me what to do next.

Birmingham called: My estrogen is 1049 (excellent!), uterine lining is 13mm and everthing (for once) looks great! I have to go back in for another scan on Sunday morning in Birmingham.  I stay on all meds until that appt.  I've kind of hit my wall with 4 shots a day.  My ovaries are protesting and the pain is traveling up my sides and wrapping around my back. I have to be careful about lifting heavy objects and quick movements.  I would guess my ovaries are at least double in size.  My egg retrieval will either be Tuesday or Wednesday depending on how things look at my Sunday appt. 

I'll update after Sunday.  Thanks for following along!