Helpful Hints

I thought I'd create a list of some helpful hints/things I've learned along the way that I think you might like to know.

For someone about to start infertility treatments:

-Wear a shirt that can be pulled up past your elbow every time you go to the clinic. Expect to have your blood drawn every visit. (and hey, if you didn't have to, celebrate!!)

-Bring a pantie liner to every doc visit. If you have a vag u/s or other vag procedure, chances are you'll need it and don't expect the clinic to have one for you.

-Have a heating pad/herb pack ready after PIO shots. The heat helps disperse the oil in your tush so you don't knot up as much.

-Warm the vial of PIO in your hand before injecting. The warmer it is, the easier it will go in.

-If you have to get a sperm sample to the lab from your house you only have an hour to do so. Keep the sample warm by putting the jar in your bra or between your legs for the car ride. (I know that sounds bad but it works!)

-Concentrate on counting to 20 or on your breathing during uncomfortable procedures.. I know that sounds kind of generic but it actually REALLY helps to distract me.

-Plan something fun for the beginning of a new/the next cycle. That way if you don't get preg you'll still have something enjoyable to look forward to.

Helpful hints for everyone else:

-Don't ask someone when they are having children or why they haven't had kids yet. It's not your business whether they want them or don't.

-Do NOT say to someone with infertility issues, "Oh don't worry, one day you'll have kids." You don't know that. You're not God and there is a good chance that the person you're talking to really can't have them and what you just said stings. And even if they can have kids, that statement isn't helpful...at all.

-Do NOT say, "Just relax. It'll happen when it happens." Seriously, don't say it. A person with endo/male infertility/PCOS/immune issues/etc. can't just "relax" and BAM get pregnant.

-Do NOT say, "Just adopt. That's when you'll get pregnant." Really?! Because you've heard from a friend's brother's wife's cousin that she adopted and then got pregnant, then I will too? WISE UP.

-Do NOT say to a woman who's just had a miscarriage, "It was God's will." YOU HAVE NO RIGHT or AUTHORITY to say that, EVER.

-Do NOT say to a woman or about a woman who's just had a miscarriage, "At least she/you have other children." It does not matter how many children she has. That was a wanted/loved/desired child no matter if she has 20 kids or one. That comment can end a friendship.

-DO say that you are sorry. DO ask what you can do for your friend. Cry with her. Offer support and be sensitive about it. Sometimes baby showers, and seeing babies and pregnant mothers, and Mother's Day doesn't bother a woman who's tried to have children for years. Other times, it hurts more than anything in the world. ASK HER which way it is for her and respect her if it hurts.

-I know you all probably don't think that what you're saying to someone who has infertility issues is troublesome, but if you're offering advice and you've never dealt with it, you're probably hurting them.

I hope those hints were a little helpful. I'm sure there are many more. I'll update this when I remember them.