BF....

BIG

FAT

NEGATIVE

I'm hurting...I'm angry...I'm frustrated...

I know God can use this time for good and I fully trust that He knows what He's doing but that doesn't mean that I'm not upset about the situation.  I desperately want to see the positive side to all of this but right now it's incredibly painful to think about it.  I don't understand why my body won't do what it's supposed to.  I don't understand why God allowed all 13 of our babies to die.  Dh and I are praying about what to do next.  Nothing?  IVF again?  I'm at a loss of what to do now. 

I still have to go in for my beta on Friday (8/17).  Talk about cruel.


Psalm 25:4-5
Show me your ways, Lord,
teach me your paths. 
Guide me in your truth and teach me,
for you are God my Savior,
and my hope is in you all day long.